Gloom Math is Fun!

QIC:  Irish

Date: 01/07/2022

PAX: Rodeo, Cookies (from F3 Wheaton, IL), Burrito, Sunburn, Best in Show

AO: Boneyard


Clear and cold (22⁰). Small patches of ice on the track. No snow, which made Cookies yearn for home.


SSH x 15 in cadence
Windmills x 15 in cadence
LBAC x 15 in cadence
LBAC (reverse) x 15 in cadence
Third Grade Exercise x 15 in cadence
Imperial Walkers x 15 in cadence

Followed up with a run up the hill and then back down, narrowly avoiding icy patches along the way. This would be our route later on in the Thang.

PAX were rather chatty during the warmup, making YHC wonder if anyone besides him was really counting, but this mumble-chatter quickly turned to grumble-chatter during the next phase of the beatdown.

The Thang

We incorporated a little bit of mental gym in the beatdown, reminding our HIM of their multiplication tables!

PAX circle around with their coupons and one PAX drew a card at random from a pre-shuffled and not-stacked-at-all deck. This card was the multiplier. Exercises below were then performed based on the multiple times times the value on the card. Number cards are their own value, Jacks are 11, Queens 12, Kings 13, Ace 15.

Incline MerkinsX2
American TwistsX3
Squats with CouponX4
Mountain Climbers (2 count)X4
Lumberjacks (2 count)X3
Decline MerkinsX2
Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes (Squat, Curl, Press)X1

After each round of exercises, we conducted an Indigenous Peoples’ Run around the lap noted above.

Example: in Round 1, Rodeo drew a 7. So we did 7 blockies, 14 incline merkins, 21 American twists and so on until the round was complete.

We did three total rounds and two Indigenous People’s Runs until grouping back up for some Broga (Mountain Pose, Downward Dog, Cobra, etc.) as a cool-down. During Round 3, we adjusted Lumberjacks to a 1x multiple based on incessant grumble-chatter.


YCH reflected on the wisdom contained in Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages. Every human favors one or two of these love languages and shows love to others (spouse, kids, friends, etc. ) using the language they favor. But this causes conflict if your favorite love language is not the same as your spouse’s. Understanding the love languages of the people in your life you love the most is a great way to show love to others in the way they want to be loved. The five languages are below and – note, they do change over time so periodic re-evaluation is recommended!

  • Words of Affirmation
  • Physical Touch
  • Acts of Service
  • Gifts
  • Quality Time

More here plus a quiz to help understand your LL:


Best in Show was a bit put out by the lack of promised coffee to end the beatdown, as Dunkin was closed due to the non-weather event and YHC did not have an adqeuate backup plan. He was promptly offered a refund on his investment for the workout, but intends to file a complaint anyway. YHC will offer coffee and donuts for the next beatdown but refuses to accept responsibility for Dunkin dropping the ball a second time.

Our guest poster, Cookies, from Chicagoland was not impressed by the Tennessee version Snowmaggedon and was less impressed by grumble-chatter, stating that he “didn’t get up early to take it easy” (or words to that effect).

Burrito apparently loves stretching/broga given the quasi-obscene sounds he made during the exercises.


Reminder to sign up for Chubby’s Homeless Ministry, either helping out or providing quality goods (coats, blankets, NEW underwear or socks). They also take monetary donations as a 503c organization.

Burrition mentioned an upcoming CSAUP extraordinaire in mid-February which promises to be a beatdown of a lifetime. I’m assuming more info is coming on the #convergence-csaup channel in Slack.

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