Author: Tim Monahan

QIC:  Irish

Date: 03/22/2022

PAX: Rodeo, Sunburn, Money Ball, Oil Can, Backfire, Iron Butt, Fissure, V-Squared

AO: Boneyard

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Conditions

53 Degrees, clear, great weather for a beatdown

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COP

• Imperial Walker – IC x 20ish
• LBAC and reverse – IC x15ish
• Windmills – IC x 12
• 3rd Grade Exercise – IC x 15ish
• SSH – IC x 10 or 12 (depending on Q’s questionable cadence calling)

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The Thang

Tabata-Time!
Tabata- style workout. 30 seconds of work, 15 seconds of rest, 8 reps (four of each exercise, alternating) per cycle. 1 minute in between cycles for rest and/or Burpee Bus shenanigans.

• Cycle 1:
  • Merkins
  • Coupon Squats
• Cycle 2:
  • Dips
  • High Knees
• Cycle 3
  • Lunges
  • Derkins
• Cycle 4
  • Mountain Climbers
  • Calf Raises
• Cycle 5
  • Irkins
  • Monkey Humpers
• Cycle 6 – Truncated due to time
  • High Plank
  • Donkey Kicks (Rodeo’s favorite!)

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COT

Set intentions for your life (i.e. long-term plans) but don’t wait to live them out. We never know just how much time we have left on this earth so don’t wait to live your dreams now before it’s too late!

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Moleskin

The Q obviously had brain fog today as evidenced by his inability to count cadence. Numerous references toTed Lasso, Tommy Boy, and – for some strange reason known only to Rodeo – the finer techniques of cow insemination.

Coffeteria afterwards, courtesy of Rodeo.

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News

Chubby’s homeless ministry (need NEW underwear and socks), Merkin challenge update (lost to Cleveland due to some hanging chad recount nonesense), CSAUP (Poker ruck)

QIC:  Irish

Date: 03/01/2022

PAX: Sunburn, Castaway, Brain Fart, V-Squared, Stork

AO: Boneyard

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Conditions

Clear, dry, and 39⁰. Perfect for some merkin workin’.

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COP

SSH x 15 in cadence
LBAC x 15 in cadence
LBAC (reverse) x 15 in cadence
WMH x 15 in cadence
Forward Fold OYO
Third-Grade Exercise x15 in cadence
Quad Stretch OYO

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The Thang

Several rounds of Merkin pain with some other squats and such thrown in for variety. Following each round, mosey around the parking lot.

Round 1:
Merkin x 10
Wide Merkin (Werkin?) x 10
Diamond Merkin x 10
Staggered Merkin (R) x 10
Staggered Merkin (L) x 10

Round 2:
Pike Merkin x 10
Military Merkin x 10
Sphinx Merkin x 10
Peter Parker x 10
Dive Bombers x 10

*Burpee Bus #1 (x5)

Round 3:
Merkin x 10
Wide Merkin x 10
Diamond Merkin x 10
Staggered Merkin (R) x 10
Staggered Merkin (L) x 10

Round 4:
Jump Squats x 30
LBCs x 30
Merkins x 10
Wide Merkins x10

*Burpee Bus #2 (x5)

Round 5:
Squats x 30
LBCs x 30
Dive Bombers x10
Peter Parkers x 10

Mary:
Stork – Scorpion Merkins x 10 OYO
V-Squared – Freddy Mercuries x 10 IC
Sunburn – (I can’t remember but I’m sure it was tough)
Brain-Fart – Leg Lifts x 30 OYO
Castaway – (I can’t remember but I’m sure it was tough)
Irish – 1 minute Merkin blow-out (AMRAP)

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COT

American culture favors self-reliance. I (and most men I know) tend to take this to the extreme and I (we) don’t usually ask for help when we need it. We try to go it alone or figure it out ourselves. F3 gives us the gift of fellowship and a community of HIM who are there to lend a hand. Don’t be afraid to reach out and ask for help (and be willing to accept help when given)!

News

-4F
-Chubby’s
-Log your Merkins here!

Moleskin

We had two MDs in the group today – one thought too many Merkins were unhealthy. So YHC turned to the other for a second opinion. Glad to know we were covered in case there was a medical emergency!

Gotta beat KC with the March Merkin Madness!

YHC brought music today but forgot it for round 1. Not sure what the PAX thought of it, but it sure motivated the Q.

Playlist: (didn’t make it through all of these)
Muse – Hysteria
Tool – Parabola
APC – Weak and Powerless
GNR – You Could be Mine
Disturbed – Indestructible
RATM – People of the Sun
Saliva – Ladies and Gentlemen
Linkin Park – In the End
Bad Religion – 21st Century Digital Boy
Fighters of Foo – Monkeywrench
Metallica – Wherever I May Roam
Chevelle – The Clincher
RHCP – Give it Away
Greta Van Fleet – Highway Tune
The Prodigy – Breathe

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Recent Backblasts

QIC:  Irish

Date: 02/15/2022

PAX: Rodeo, Sunburn, Castaway, Brain Fart, V-Squared

AO: Boneyard

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Conditions

Clear 29⁰. Full moon cast a eerie glow over the AO.

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COP

SSH x 15 in cadence
Forward Fold – oyo
Downward Dog – oyo
Seal Claps x 15 in cadence
“Quad” Stretch – oyo
Pigeon Stretch – oyo
LBAC x 15 in cadence
LBAC (reverse) x 15 in cadence

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The Thang

Five rounds of exercises. Each round started with a mosey around the AO track. Loose adaptation of the The Murph exercise, but with the same level of respect for LT Murphy, USN, patriot and hero.

Round 1:
Mosey Lap
Pull Ups: 10
Merkins: 20
Jump Squats: 30

Round 2:
Mosey Lap
Dips: 20
Incline Merkins: 40
Lunges: 60

Round 3:
Mosey Lap
Decline Merkins: 30
Imperial Walkers: 80
Monkey Humpers: 120

Round 4:
Mosey Lap
Dips: 20
Incline Merkins: 40
Lunges: 60

Round 5: (truncated due to time)
Pull Ups: 10
Diamond Merkins: 10

Cool Down:
Various broga poses and stretches (Mountain Pose, Cobra, Forward Fold, Downward Dog, Child’s Pose, etc.)

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COT

A failure to plan is a plan to fail, even for far-off events. As I reflected on my mother-in-law dying, I realized that there was really no plan on final resting place, funeral, etc. So in the midst of grief, the family also has to plan a funeral, make arrangements, etc. – essentially be a project manager and coordinate a lot of activity instead of focusing on their loss and their loved ones. It’s a bit macabre, but having a plan for your final arrangements now is an incredible gift to your spouse and family as it allows them time and space to mourn. YHC has some homework to do this weekend . . .

News

-Tuff Muff
-Chubby’s
-Habitat (may be moved due to conflict with TM)

Moleskin

Apparently YHC doesn’t know the difference between a hamstring and a quad (or his right from left for that matter). The group turned to the expert opinion of our resident MD, Brain Fart, who showed his disdain for all anatomy below the neck, referring to the entire leg as a “lower appendage.” We are not sure if we did quad or hamstring stretches, but we did work on our lower appendages during this beatdown.

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Recent Backblasts

QIC:  Irish

Date: 01/07/2022

PAX: Rodeo, Cookies (from F3 Wheaton, IL), Burrito, Sunburn, Best in Show

AO: Boneyard

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Conditions

Clear and cold (22⁰). Small patches of ice on the track. No snow, which made Cookies yearn for home.

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COP

SSH x 15 in cadence
Windmills x 15 in cadence
LBAC x 15 in cadence
LBAC (reverse) x 15 in cadence
Third Grade Exercise x 15 in cadence
Imperial Walkers x 15 in cadence

Followed up with a run up the hill and then back down, narrowly avoiding icy patches along the way. This would be our route later on in the Thang.

PAX were rather chatty during the warmup, making YHC wonder if anyone besides him was really counting, but this mumble-chatter quickly turned to grumble-chatter during the next phase of the beatdown.

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The Thang

We incorporated a little bit of mental gym in the beatdown, reminding our HIM of their multiplication tables!

PAX circle around with their coupons and one PAX drew a card at random from a pre-shuffled and not-stacked-at-all deck. This card was the multiplier. Exercises below were then performed based on the multiple times times the value on the card. Number cards are their own value, Jacks are 11, Queens 12, Kings 13, Ace 15.

Blockies	x1
Incline Merkins	X2
American Twists	X3
Squats with Coupon	X4
LBCs	X5
Mountain Climbers (2 count)	X4
Lumberjacks (2 count)	X3
Decline Merkins	X2
Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes (Squat, Curl, Press)	X1

After each round of exercises, we conducted an Indigenous Peoples’ Run around the lap noted above.

Example: in Round 1, Rodeo drew a 7. So we did 7 blockies, 14 incline merkins, 21 American twists and so on until the round was complete.

We did three total rounds and two Indigenous People’s Runs until grouping back up for some Broga (Mountain Pose, Downward Dog, Cobra, etc.) as a cool-down. During Round 3, we adjusted Lumberjacks to a 1x multiple based on incessant grumble-chatter.

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COT

YCH reflected on the wisdom contained in Gary Chapman’s book The Five Love Languages. Every human favors one or two of these love languages and shows love to others (spouse, kids, friends, etc. ) using the language they favor. But this causes conflict if your favorite love language is not the same as your spouse’s. Understanding the love languages of the people in your life you love the most is a great way to show love to others in the way they want to be loved. The five languages are below and – note, they do change over time so periodic re-evaluation is recommended!

• Words of Affirmation
• Physical Touch
• Acts of Service
• Gifts
• Quality Time

More here plus a quiz to help understand your LL: https://www.5lovelanguages.com/

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Moleskin

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Best in Show was a bit put out by the lack of promised coffee to end the beatdown, as Dunkin was closed due to the non-weather event and YHC did not have an adqeuate backup plan. He was promptly offered a refund on his investment for the workout, but intends to file a complaint anyway. YHC will offer coffee and donuts for the next beatdown but refuses to accept responsibility for Dunkin dropping the ball a second time.

Our guest poster, Cookies, from Chicagoland was not impressed by the Tennessee version Snowmaggedon and was less impressed by grumble-chatter, stating that he “didn’t get up early to take it easy” (or words to that effect).

Burrito apparently loves stretching/broga given the quasi-obscene sounds he made during the exercises.

News

Reminder to sign up for Chubby’s Homeless Ministry, either helping out or providing quality goods (coats, blankets, NEW underwear or socks). They also take monetary donations as a 503c organization.

Burrition mentioned an upcoming CSAUP extraordinaire in mid-February which promises to be a beatdown of a lifetime. I’m assuming more info is coming on the #convergence-csaup channel in Slack.

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Recent Backblasts