Phil Collins Day – A day which will live in infamy [tribute]

QIC:  Prosciutto

Date: 08/19/2022

PAX: Bernie, FNG-Headgear, Full Moon, Hurt Locker, Love Boat, Manscaper, Mr. Burns, Ricki Lake, Quackers (Respect), Roundup, Term Limit, Toe Jelly, Tube Squeeze, Uncle Joe, Weblow, Woodrider, WuzntMe, Zoosk

AO: Hacksaw


To start, the weather… which was spectacular; mid/high 60’s and a large volume of floating precipitation (some call it relative humidity, but what is that even, really?). When I’m in the mood to have a bit of fun, I think about RELATIVE part of relative humidity. Take this example. On occasion, you may be asked

“How are you?” or in Soddy-Daisy, they say, “How yins bin gettin along?”… to which, your relative humidity response is, “Relatively speaking, sir/madam/it/they, we are 70%. AveryLouise-ElizabethGrace just had a tooth pulled by an orthodontist we named this morning ‘Headgear’. Our youngest, SterlinJoe MapleGlaze has really taken a liking to fishing this summer. So, relatively good”.

— Or, how about this’n…

Let’s say I need to buy a set of tires and am looking to see what it’d cost me for my 2003 ‘Champagne’ (Desert Sand) Honda Accord (real nice) …. the Soddy-Daisy inquiry goes like this,

“2003 Hyundai, you sed? When you fixin’ to grow a set and buy a truck with real man attitude and knob’d tar’s, wussy boy? You even go by a boy, anyways? Not with that stupid sensible family sedan. Grow a set ‘nden come see me. Y’aint wastin’ my time no more. Also, humidity ain’t kin to no’one, what’s all that relative booshit?!”

Relative Humidity would say: “That response seems to be 80% fair, 40% inaccurate and 11% laced with American badass. By the way, I drive a Honda, not a Hyundai.”

I digress, this is supposed to be about the conditions; but the reader can obviously … err, how do I put this… Relate.

YHC had anticipated rain, but alas The Steve was incorrect in its position last night, promising 60% chance of it. A big fat zero amount of precip this morning made Prosciutto 99% unhappy. YHC must’ve learned the nursery song wrong, “Rain rain come today, come back again everyday. Make our day great okay, rain rain come today.” Happiness doesn’t look to tomorrow, though, right? OOH! WAIT UNTIL THE END!

Aside from the weather and “conditions” report. Can we talk about the sound of the traffic over dey? Seriously, I’m hoarse from over-projection in cadence and instruction. They’s too many houses up-in the Collegedale city limits. That, or Collegedale parkway is too convenient for the rural folks (who talk like the Soddy’s). It’s gotta stop.

The grass where we laid / flopped around / sometimes just had conversation while laying around, seemed to be recently trimmed which was just great because gobs of grass down your Fabletics go nowhere but straight to one’s arsehole; couple that with the relative… ahh, you get it. That’s a gift that keeps on giving, if you ask me. But you didn’t. You want to know what we worked on? Guess what, it’s coming. And it wasn’t our feelings. Maybe, perhaps, our relative feelings?

Foot hydration score was relatively 65 out of a total possible 99. You see, the relative scale doesn’t allow for such upper boundary readings (or lower for that matter), so you can remove the 100 and the 0 from any relative scale. They’re far-too exact. This relative stuff is just as inexact as it is inaccurate.


1/2 mile jaunt to and around the flags, then some stretching, mid-wife noises, SSHs, 3rd Grade Exercises, WMHs, discussion on tappy-taps (wtf?), YELLING CADENCE BECAUSE OF THE TRAFFIC — CAN YOU EVEN READ THIS, IT’S SO LOUD?!

The Thang

Must say — was thinking this one up for a few weeks since I know the Hacksaw faithful are a demanding bunch of athletic prestige.

Like LA Gear commercials used to say, “If you don’t come strong, you don’t come at all.”
4 bang ladder
Ladder to 11, like any old ladder routine, but with a pack of four exercises and a surprise on the other end. 1 and 10, 2 and 9, 3 and 8, 4 and 7… and so on.

1 – HR Merkin, SSH, Bonnie Blair, X-Factors
-run to the far cone-
10 SSH and 1 Blockee (yes, just one, Zima; it’s okay this way)

Repeat until flip flopped

4 Jail breaks in between at YHC call


James Oppenheimer wrote:
“The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise man grows happiness under his feet.

Today, you have today. Tomorrow is tomorrow. Save tomorrow’s worries for tomorrow — don’t miss out on your chance of happiness today. For today, every second, every moment today you have the choice to choose happy. Grow your happiness today (now) and happiness in the distance will find you; rain or no rain. Compound it like inflation and spread it like butter.


On this day in 2022, Prosciutto’s Phil Collins Day Q goes on record as the greatest day in Hacksaw AO history

Them: “This is the greatest workout we’ve ever had at Hacksaw”
Me: “I know. Relatively speaking.”

Even though I had to endure a one-way 26 mile drive to your land of disenchantment, I did enjoy my time. Missed a few friendly faces which would have widened my scope to yell more loudly, but I’d do that for y’all if it ever came to it. But, I’m just not sorry enough that you missed what some say was the greatest event in Hacksaw’s history. Second only to my last Q here by a few relative degrees. Most of you missed that, too. ::peace-sign::


Iron Pax “Challenge”, Chubby’s ongoing efforts, Chinese Metal Rock concert October 2nd (see Full Moon for details)

Recent Backblasts

    Only Fools Believe There Is a Hill at Hacksaw

    QIC:  Full Moon

    Date: 04/01/2022

    PAX: Chief, Ditka, El Chapo (RESPECT), Landmine, Life Alert, M.I.A., Mayhem (RESPECT), Mr. Burns, Sousa, Toe Jelly, Toe Tag, Top ‘Em, Uncle Joe

    AO: Hacksaw


    45 degrees or so – perfect weather for broga foolishness


    Met at the Commons; disclosure

    SSH x26; forward fold, OYO; walk it out to downward dog, heels on the ground, then right over left, left over right; move to plank for world’s greatest okayest stretch – right, then left

    Mosey from the Commons to the top of Mt. Hacksaw the Increased Gravity Zone

    The Thang

    A Ladder, of sorts

    Upon completion of each rung/mosey, PAX were instructed to plank/have tea time to wait for six… mostly heavy breathing, cursing of YHC, and 10 counts ensued

    Up the ladder we go
    1st rung: 10 burpees, mosey to the bottom of Mt. Hacksaw the Increased Gravity Zone

    2nd rung: 10 burpees, 20 squats, mosey to the top of Mt. Hacksaw the Increased Gravity Zone

    3rd rung: 10 burpees, 20 squats, 30 big bois, mosey to the bottom

    4th rung: 10 burpees, 20 squats, 30 big bois, 40 flutter kicks (hard count), mosey to the top

    5th rung (top of the ladder): 10 burpees, 20 squats, 30 big bois, 40 flutter kicks (hard count), 50 heel touches (hard count), mosey to the bottom

    Back down the ladder, yet up the Increased Gravity Zone
    4th rung: 10 burpees, 20 squats, 30 big bois, 40 flutter kicks (hard count), mosey to the top

    3rd rung: 10 burpees, 20 squats, 30 big bois, mosey to the bottom

    2nd rung: 10 burpees, 20 squats, mosey back to the Commons

    1st rung: 10 burpees Time


    Don’t just be in the moment, enjoy it – whether it be with family or friends, working out, at work, etc. Not all moments are enjoyable but find the good where you can, especially with loved ones, and enjoy it.


    No one was fooled by YHC’s attempt at pranking the PAX into believing they were in for a relaxing broga set

    “Full Moon: you realize we’re still running, right?”

    Uncle Joe continues to insist heel touches are a partner exercise… YHC does not completely disagree, but for today they remained solo

    Mr. Burns was excused to handle some very important paperwork… thankfully we have (for now) a Johnny-On-The-Spot nearby

    Life Alert lamented, a lot, that we ran way more than YHC had led him to believe – this is debatable depending on one’s point of view, yet he may never come back to Hacksaw

    “Stay away from me or I’m gonna hit you” – directed at YHC

    “Hated it” – everyone


    Sousa’s going away #2nd-f event tomorrow, 4/2 – see channel and/or Blue for info on how to sign up to throw axes at Sousa; Chubby’s; Habitat for Humanity dates now live on #3rd-f; upcoming 2.0 days (including Good Friday w/Mr. Burns at the Hack); Inaugural Battery PokerRunRuck For the Cure Brought to You by Mountain Dew on 4/23; Grow Ruck event upcoming – see Vila, Mayhem, or Ducktales

    There IS a Core Down There

    QIC:  M.I.A.

    Date: 02/21/22

    PAX: Full Moon, Ramrod (Respect), Tinder, Toe Tag

    AO: Hacksaw


    It was a real beaut of a morning. About 40 and light wind.


    Mosey to the Veteran’s Park, followed by a lap around the outside of the park.

    Forward Fold
    Willie Mays Hayes
    Lil’ Baby Arm Circles
    Big Arm Circles

    Enough of that

    The Thang

    5 Stations:
    Flutter Kicks
    Deadlift (60 lb. Sandbag)
    Ab Roller (of Death)
    Slam Ball American Hammers
    Slam Ball Burpee Toss – Control

    Each PAX at a station, completed exercise until the control station completed a circuit of throwing the slam ball approximately 25 yards (burpee before each toss) and back. Then PAX rotate.

    After each complete rotation PAX completed an indigenous people’s run around the park (400m)


    There was a COT. If you were there you heard it.


    There was a large amount of dislike of that ab roller.

    YHC was filling in for a HIM that had to deal with some family issues, offered to two other PAX to take the Q, as both hemmed and hawed, YHC finally had to take the reigns. Those two PAX still moaned about it.

    Toe Tag blames the ab roller (of death) for his probable hernia. YHC takes referral fees doc.


    3rd F things, 1st F things…. we may need to plan some more 2nd F things.

    Recent Backblasts

      Group Exercises do not imply Partner Exercises

      QIC: Full Moon

      Date: 01/28/2022

      PAX: AOL, Escobar, Mayhem, Ramrod, Seagull, Toe Tag, Tube Squeeze, Uncle Joe

      AO: Hacksaw


      Still cold, 35ish, but not as miserable as the other day


      SSH x25 IC, WMH x12 IC, Toe Merkins x25 OYO, Forward Fold x10 IC, LBAC x10 IC, RLBAC x10 IC, Tea Time OYO (not a partner exercise, despite Uncle Joe’s insistence it is)

      Mosey from the Flag to the Flag

      The Thang

      Friday fill-ins are fun (alliteration, amiright?) – will we do the same thing as Wednesday? Will it be something completely brand new and earth-shattering? Or, way more likely, will YHC shamelessly duplicate another workout (with some mods) from a recent post?

      For this routine, PAX were advised to focus on form and not worry about # of sets – some of them took this to mean they need only apply minimal effort, which was promptly struck down – underachieving does not equal solid, hard work (TWSS)

      The Workout that is much better with music, but no music was provided:
      13 of each:
      Air Lifters (somebody’s gotta raise this roof)
      Leg Lifts (Heels to Heaven, Kamala Harrises, et al.)
      Plank Jacks
      Dips – these can be a partner exercise, should you need more resistance (and have a willing partner… TWSS)

      Do 13 reps of each, take a lap on the inner loop, then do 12, then 11… down to 1 – be sure to take a lap after each set (this is a Full Moon Q, after all). Most PAX got through the set with 6 reps of the exercises, while the overachievers absolute units (cough, AOL, Mayhem, Toe Tag, cough) got through 5, maybe 4


      Birthday Burpees for Tube Squeeze!


      Patience and being present, especially with 2.0’s. YHC’s kiddos are amazing all the way around (no bias), but they sure know how to press buttons. Being patient and letting them work through feelings/outbursts/etc. is much easier, eventually, than exacerbating the situation by blowing up. Regarding being present: it’s all to easy at the end of a long day to just sit and peruse the ole phone (esp. on Friday’s with Pro’s Wordle commentary…) but, you know what’s way more fun? Cooking fake food and mixing fakes drinks with the 2.0’s for a fake party they are putting on later – cheers.

      Be patient. Be present. Be kind. Enjoy life and the people around you.


      “I could certainly do without the laps” and “I’ve seen enough of you this week, Full Moon”


      Chubby’s – we need to fill up Feb. schedule

      Multiple Habitat for Humanity opportunities available – see #3rd-f channel and Mayhem – these may be rescheduled based on response

      Tuff Muff coming up – see #convergence-csaup channel – gonna be fun/ridiculous

      4th Weekend – see channel and/or WuzntMe

      The U officially launches Monday, 1/31 – Mondays & Wednesdays 0530 at East Hamilton High

      Recent Backblasts

        Conscientious Objector

        QIC:  Mr. Clean

        Date: 01/21/2022

        PAX: Blair Witch, Choo Choo, Full Moon, Ramrod, Tube Squeeze 

        AO: Hacksawi


        Somewhere between — I can’t feel anything and 28 degrees. Giant “Ole Glory” was waving with glorious symmetry in the whipping winds. Desmond and the many others looked upon us as a reminder to always give “just one more”.


        SSH x20 IC
        Forward Fold OYO
        Willie Mays Hayes x12 IC
        SSH x10 IC

        The Thang

        Mosey to “The” Flag, and drop our blocks with Desmond to stand guard. From here, we started the Thang.

        Catch Me if You Can
        Grab a partner. Partner 1 completes 20 Plank Jacks.
        Partner 2 bear crawls.
        Partner 1 moseys to Partner 2.
        Flapjack it.
        Rinse and Repeat it until we arrive back to Desmond.
        Plank for the Six.

        Upper Body Dora
        Shoulder Presses — 200
        Curls — 200
        Bench Press — 200
        Bent Over Rows — 200
        Leg Raises — 200
        Pax seemed to grumble a bit about the traveling method. If YHC recalls correctly, it was something along the lines of; “we couldn’t just do a regular Dora, we had to almost like a suicide thing or ladder deal”.
        Above is a pretty accurate description: each time a partner traveled he went to, he went one Star further and ran back. Once we got to the Army Star, it got much much easier as we worked our way in reverse from there.
        Time. Mosey to Flag.


        Desmond Doss, known for incomparable bravery, was a “Conscientious Objector”. In the times I have Qed Hacksaw, I failed to truly recognize this American Hero, and the example he gives us in which to live.
        We all have a moral compass, and in today’s world, we are often encouraged that our moral compass calls us to anger or “set aside” someone with different viewpoints or different moral compasses.
        Desmond Doss reminds us we should have a different approach in life.
        As Choo Choo reminded us at Shot House on Monday, our mental state and mental discipline, or lack thereof, guide our habits. Our habits create a perception of us to others.
        How do his COT meld with Desmond Doss’s lesson? A strong moral compass will guide self-discipline which will create positive habits which, in turn, will only help others see a positive light and love in us.
        See, Desmond had a strong moral compass, so much so that he loved his fellow man enough to serve and risk his life but also stood behind his morals of not harming another person. He reminds us of the power of standing strong in our morals while also providing love and service to others.
        How about we strive to do this? Stand strong for what is right. What is right is loving and serving others. This takes immeasurable amounts of self-discipline, BUT it also leads to positive habits that impact others in a positive way.
        Finally, in turn, those positive habits often lead to the “change you want to see in the world”.


        “WE couldn’t just do an easy Dora, we had to do like a suicide or ladder type thing” — Full Moon
        Somehow, Totanka’s running pace was mentioned…News Flash — He. Runs. Fast.
        Apparently, there was a lot of arm work completed at the Hackliment locations this week.
        “There is no fast way to do these either” — response to a change from Upright Rows to Leg Raises


        Tough Muff — Details coming

        Recent Backblasts

          The Shopkeeper and His Son Were A Different Story Altogether…

          QIC:  WuzntMe

          Date: 1/17/22

          PAX: Ramrod, Full Moon, John Doe, WreckedEm (with a W), MIA, Bernie, Choo Choo



          Cold, frozen, and covered in ice and snow. However, you wouldn’t know from Ramrod’s insistence that it’s shorts weather.


          Various amounts of SSH and stretches. Plus some burpees. Unoriginal.

          The Thang

          Countdown to the Countdown:

          13 of each:
          Leg Lifts
          Incline merkins
          Decline merkins

          Do all 13, then when finished, do 12, then 11, so on. Everytime the timer goes off, 5 dips.

          Q: Modification for dips?
          A: Burpees.
          Choo Choo: hellyeah. <proceeds to do burpees in weightvest while somewhere in the distance a bald eagle screams and freedom happens and we win the cold war again>

          Pax “enjoyed” some stoner rock.


          Shared a story about how yesterday I was consumed with a task at hand, and almost missed an opportunity to pepper my M with snowballs. I am admittedly awful about getting focused on a task and forgetting to actually live in the moment. One day, after I will have spent the entirety of my life making plans, I will realize that I have burned through my youth and the only plan left is to die. Live in the moment, put aside your plans, and take the opportunities as they come.


          Pretty sure that this is the first time the term “douchebag” has ever been used during formal prayer requests. Our apologies to the Almighty, but we are thankful for John Doe’s new adventure. Douchebag.

          Full Moon forgot about Clutch. Vamanos, vamanos.

          Ramrod voiced his displeasure that the PAXs’ Ms don’t respect classic drummers.

          Most of the PAX have been through this particular workout before; MIA reminded me that this was unoriginal. I reminded him of the Hacksaw mission statement : World’s most unoriginal AO, where everything is likely to be better somewhere else.


          Tuff Muff on 2/19
          4th F Weekend in May

          Recent Backblasts

            Hacksaw Men Love to Bear Crawl!

            QIC:  Abercrombie

            Date: 12/31/2021

            PAX: Bernie, Cooter, Escobar, Full Moon, M.I.A., Oui Oui, Picabo, Seagull, Tinder

            AO: Hacksaw


            Mid 50’s, nice breeze, few wet spots in the pavement, PERFECT CONDITONS


            •Side Staddle Hop (25 IC)

            •Forward fold to calf stretch

            •Calf raises (50 regular, 50 pigeon, 50 duck, 50 regular)

            •Mosey to the Collegedale Library

            •Motivators (We counted down from 10)

            •LBACs (10 IC)

            The Thang

            Bear crawl in cadence with Merkin. This was miserable, but we made it to 100 merkins!

            Bear crawl Indian run (Bataan Death Crawl). Pax in the front yells “five!” (I come from the Battery and that’s as high as we can count). This is a signal for the Pax in the back to complete 3 burpees and run to the front of the line and yells “Five!”.

            Killer B’s

            •Broad jump to 1st cone

            •10 Burpees

            •10 Bonnie Blairs

            •10 Big Boys

            •Bear crawl back

            We only completed one round of Killer B’s

            Dora Bear Crawl: One Pax Bear Crawls while the other curls for a total of 100

            Mary: Picabo (Plank) Cooter (Heel Touches) TIME!


            For the COT, I wanted to put in a plug for the Q Source at Chic-fil-a following Monday morning beatdowns.  Q Source is leadership study materials developed by the co-founders of F3.  I shared highlights from the chapter on Influence (Q2.2).  Basically, there are two primary ways to influence people to an advantageous change: words (and the way you say them) and deeds (the behavior you model).  A high impact man understands that movement must be voluntary for it to result in a true advantage, and he can not compel movement through the force of his will.

            Anyway, its good stuff.  If you have never attended, you are missing out. 


            Ok, I probably had one of my biggest laughs during this Q. At one point during the bear crawl merkins, I turned around to realize that I was the only one actually doing anything; the entire pax was just walking behind me counting cadence. What a bunch of wise guys!

            I’m not sure if the motivators actually motivated anyone, but I am sure that everyone pushed themselves and got a little bit better this morning.


            Convergence tomorrow! Be safe tonight.

            Recent Backblasts

              8 BAMF Dorka – Like a Dora, but a little dumber

              QIC:  Tatonka

              Date: 11/29/2021

              PAX: AOL, Bandwagon, Bernie, Choo Choo, iLean, Lutefisk, M.I.A., Mandela, Mr. Burns, Picabo, Seagull, Sea Through, Toe Tag, Uncle Joe, Wuzn’tMe

              AO: Hacksaw


              Low 30s, low wind. Cold but manageable as long as Q kept PAX moving


              SSH x10 IC
              LBAC x 10 IC
              SSH x10 IC
              Reverse LBAC x10 IC
              SSH x10 IC
              Seal Claps x 10 IC
              SSH x10 IC
              Moroccan Night Clubs x10 IC
              SSH x10 IC

              The Thang

              8 BAMF Dorka
              PAX partner up

              Partner 1 runs a lap of the inside circle
              Partner 2 completes the designated exercise until Partner 1 returns
              Partner 1 then begins doing designated exercise while Partner 2 runs

              A typical Dora consists of completing a set number of reps of each exercise before switching to the next exercise. This workout did not have a goal rep count of each exercise. Rather, PAX continued with one exercise until Q called for a switch. Hence this was a Dorka, kind of like a Dora but a little dumber.

              Exercises completed were:
              8 count bodybuilders x 5 min
              Big Boy Sit Ups x 5 min
              Air Squats x 5 min
              Mountain Climbers x 5 min
              Flutter Kicks x 5 min

              After 5 minutes of flutter kicks, PAX performed the following:

              Indian Run
              Merkin Circle – PAX position themselves in high plank position. Q completes one merkin while rest of PAX hold high plank. Next PAX in line completes one merkin followed by next PAX in line who completes one merkin, etc. When it gets back to Q, Q completes 2 merkins. Next PAX in line completes 2 merkins, etc. We repeated this process to a 5 merkin count.

              Finished with 2 minutes of Mary


              Mark 10:45 – “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”

              I spoke on the importance of being a servant to others, especially this time of year. It’s easy to get caught up in material things around the holidays, but service towards others comes in many forms and can be often overlooked. My pastor spoke on it a month ago and told everyone to set a daily alarm for 10:45 AM that says, “Mark 10:45 – How can I be a servant today?” This daily reminder helps keep me in check and forces me to think about ways I can serve others in my daily life to ultimately live a more Christlike lifestyle.


              It turns out that no gloves while planking on concrete for several minutes is not a great combination. Just ask Mandela.

              Picabo looked entirely too excited for his turn in Mary when he called 1 minute plank to end the workout.

              M.I.A. loved the Q’s music selection so much. He neglected to point it out until he was thanking him for his leadership in the slack channel later that morning.


              Chubbies is always looking for volunteers on Monday nights to minister to Chattanooga’s homeless population. Talk to Mayhem or check the serve schedule on the 3rd-F slack channel if you are interested in helping out.

              Several guys have come down with injuries or other life events that are going to keep them away from F3 for a while. Not everyone has another outlet for fellowship so make sure to reach out to guys to check in with them.

              Recent Backblasts

                Disappointment Abounds

                QIC:  M.I.A.

                Date: 11/05/2021

                PAX:  Abercrombie, AOL, El Chapo, Escobar, FNG-Fortnite, Full Moon, FNG-Hillshire, Landmine, Mandela, Mr. Burns, Oui Oui, Picabo, FNG-Pit Bike, Ramrod, Rollback, SeaGull, Spirit Fingers, Sousa, Stork, Top’Em, Uncle Joe, WeBlow, WuzntMe

                AO:  Hacksaw


                Those expected the temps in the 30’s as forecasted were disappointed. YHC and everyone around him found this to be the least disappointing part of the beatdown.


                Rifle Carry to the flag pole.

                30(ish?) SSH
                LBAC & Reverse x 13
                Stretch out those shoulders…

                The Thang

                All exercises completed together. Holding the coupon above your head until the 6 is in:

                5 x Blockees
                10 x Curls
                15 x Overhead Press
                20 x Around the World (Imagine the coupon is a satellite and your head is the planet)

                5 x Around the World
                10 x Blockees*
                15 x Curls
                20 x Overhead Press

                5 x Overhead Press
                10 x Around the World
                15 x Blockees
                20 x Curls

                5 x Curls
                10 x Overhead Press
                15 x Around the World
                20 x Blockees

                5 x Head, Shoulders, Knees & Toes
                10 x Louganis
                15 x Triceps Extension
                20 x Weighted Flutter Kicks

                5 x Weighted Flutter Kicks
                10 x HSK&T
                15 x Louganis
                20 x Triceps Extensions

                5 x Triceps Extensions
                10 x Flutter Kicks
                15 x HSK&T
                20 x Louganis

                Time – Disappointed ensued because we didn’t finish.


                YHC feels that men don’t hear/share their appreciation and love for each other enough. Inspired by a F3 Podcast from many moons ago, YHC mused on the importance of letting other men know they are loved.


                * This was the moment that almost all the PAX groaned and shared their disappointment (loudly) with YHC.

                • AOL picked up three dudes pre-workout. They may have been of age… they may not.
                • Upon completion of the Side Straddle Hops YHC noted that this was the completion of the leg exercises for the day…. Mandela squealed with glee.
                • Escobar “WHOA!!! That is the biggest 6 inches I have ever seen”
                • Picabo and WuzntMe accused YHC of being a sadist, but they did it with a Cheshire grin
                • Sousa admitted to breaking YHC’s coupon maliciously
                • Sousa also admitted he would have posted elsewhere (the fartsack) if he saw the post regarding the switcheroo at Q
                • Sewer gases leaked from somewhere/someone during workout.


                6 AM at Hill City – Thanksgiving Day convergence, followed by the Grateful Gobbler 5K. Wear your F3 attire, EH your fellow runners. Register here:

                Decomposing Burpees

                QIC:  Tatonka

                Date: 07/12/2021

                PAX: Oui Oui, AOL, WEBLOW, WuzntMe, M.I.A., Tube Squeeze, SeaGull, Uncle Joe, Toe Tag

                AO: Hacksaw


                70’s with some wet ground from the night’s rain. No rain during the beatdown though so we had that going on for us!


                SSH x 15 IC

                Forward Fold OYO

                Willie Mays Hayes x 16 IC

                Quad Stretch

                LBAC x 10 IC

                Reverse LBAC x 10 IC

                Chinooks x 10 IC

                Seal Claps x 10 IC

                Moroccan Night Clubs x 10 IC

                Cherry Pickers x 10 IC

                Calf Stretches OYO

                The Thang

                Decomposing Burpees

                1. Navy SEAL Burpees x 2 min

                200m run

                1. Mountain Climber Burpee x 2 min

                200m run

                1. 8 count body builders x 2 min

                200m run

                1. Burpees x 2 min

                200m run

                1. Royal Jumping Burpee (a merkin-less burpee with a jump and clap at the end) x 2 min

                200m run

                1. Royal Burpee (apparently the OG traditional burpee; no merkin, no jump, no clap) x 2 min

                200m run

                1. Air Squats x 2 min

                200m run

                1. Plank x 2 min

                Circle up for some Mary for time

                Scissor kicks (Oui Oui)

                Pickle Pointers (AOL)

                Little Baby Crunches (WEBLOW)

                Boat Canoes (WuzntMe)

                Run a lap (M.I.A.)


                The Father’s Day sermon at my church was all about lawns and weeds. It’s not enough to just kill the weeds and hope the lawn will look better and prosper. You must reseed the lawn in order to get newer healthier grass to grow in place where the weeds once were. If you don’t reseed the bare spot, the weeds will just come back. Furthermore, a small weed doesn’t stay a small weed for very long. Very quickly it will multiple into numerous bigger weeds if not addressed soon enough. The spiritual metaphor is that it’s not enough to just remove weeds (sin) from our lives, we must replace it with better and healthier actions to live a more Christ like life.

                The exercises we completed “got easier” as we removed a component from the prior exercise. For example, the Navy SEAL burpee consists of three merkins and a mountain climber movement on each leg. The following exercise, the mountain climber burpee, removed two of the three merkins from the prior exercise. Likewise, the eight count body builder that followed removed and replaced the mountain climber leg movement with a plank jack. This pattern continued with each subsequent exercise until we were just in the plank position.

                As we progressed through the exercises, we weren’t just removing a component and sitting around doing nothing. We replaced what we removed with something that still made us better and helped us improve ourselves. Likewise, this is how we should remove sin from our lives and replace with actions that continue to help us grow spiritually into healthier stronger Christian men.


                At one point, Q was referred to as John Doe, Jr. because the thang seemed to focus around a single exercise. The Q is not sure if this was intended to be an insult but took it as a compliment anyway.

                Oui Oui was quick to point out that a burpee (or any variation thereof) is an excellent full body workout. The Q appreciates this open minded approach.

                “2 minutes at my house doesn’t ever last this long” – AOL

                There was some chatter about proper burpee form, whether a merkin is involved in a traditional burpee, whether there is a jump and clap at the end, etc. etc.

                It turns out the originator of the “burpee” was named Royal Burpee (I looked it up on the internet, so it’s probably true). His OG burpee consisted of no merkin and no jump or clap; just an outward thrusting of the feet into a plank position.


                Fallen Five convergence at The Dame/Hot Dam/Dam straight/Frankly my dear I don’t give a Dam this Saturday 7/17/21 from 0700-0800. Fallen Five ruck to follow immediately afterwards.

                3rd F opportunity at Chubbies on Monday nights. Reach out to John Doe if interested and available to serve.

                2nd F opportunity this Friday 7/16/21 at 1600 at the Fountainhead taproom. Out of town PAX that are in town for the Fallen Five event will also be invited and encouraged to attend for some 2nd F.

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